Baptism Blues
Jan. 10th
(I only had the title 'Baptism Blues' up from Jan.10th-Jan13th, hence the reason behind comments one and two)
Jan. 14th
Ok, I cannot promise that I am done sighing, or shaking my head, but I am ready to communicate. I would like to think that most of us are pretty 'good natured' about a lot of things that happen in our parish. Most of us readily acknowledge our humanness and move on.
Once we were told to stay after mass to take group pictures for the parish directory. We were promised that it wouldn't take long. I admit I thought they would call out the different groups: CCD teachers, lectors, hospitality etc and everyone would dutifully gather and smile. I actually had a huge grin on my face when we all were instructed to gather in the pews, regardless of areas of participation, and the photographer took one large group shot. Many were grinning at me and I admit I did sigh and say that this was a 'blog item', another sign that we were institutionalized. I am looking forward to seeing which groups were considered distinct enough to warrent a picture together? Stay tuned.
Back to the Baptism blues! Recently, the couple who had been in charge of the baptismal instruction for almost 18 years received a call from our new deacon that he would be doing the baptism class that Sunday and he would need the materials they had. Two others who had also been involved with the team were also called and told that they were no longer needed. I seriously doubt that anyone considers the deacon in a negative light. One of the team members graciously told me in a letter that doing part of the ceremony is actually the role of a deacon.
So why am I blue? Because the team members could see it coming, but were not prepared for the rug finally being pulled out from under them. Noone actually sat down face to face and discussed it with them. I guess I am sad that good people continue to be moved out of positions where they have been asked, or actually expected to use their gifts for many years under different priests. The institutionalization of the parish probably won't stop. Is that a bad thing? I am the first to admit that the bulletin looks good, everything is neat and orderly, and there seems to be a lot of activities in our parish. So why does the institution still cry for "unity" and 'healing'? Transfiguration of the Lord Parish is looking verrrry professional and that is all that is really important, right? Nod our heads and look the other way, we really don't understand how to be good parishioners anyway.
I thought of the scene in Forest Gump where Forest asked Jenny to marry him. As he is quietly rejected (thinking its because he was not intelligent) he turned and said to her, "I may not be a smart man, but I know what love is."
Yes, lots of parishioners who ministered to the people for years, may not have been theologians, but they knew what love was. And it was enough. God bless 'em.
posted by Karen @ 6:08 PM
8 comments
8 Comments:
Is it just my computer or is this a dead air space ?
Your computer is fine!
This writer has again run into the "dead air space" of the institution. when I'm done shaking my head, and sighing, I'll be able to write.
Karen, you are mistaken. We were not called and told we were no longer needed on the Baptism team. We were sent an email from the other team members, that they had also sent to father, after they were called by the deacon. They asked father if this meant that the baptism team was now defunct. Father emailed them back & also sent the email to us maybe on purpose or maybe by accident, but the email did not give any indication that we were supposed to stay on. So we didn't go to the Baptism class on Sunday Jan. 6th The deacon did call & ask us if we wanted to stay on the following monday. We have not made a decision yet, but what about the other team members? We have only been doing this about 2 years. We don't feel right moving ahead without them. We thought we made a good team. We were told they said they no longer wanted to be on the team. I read the email sent to father. It read, if it's not a help to you then there's no point in continuing. They just thought it should have come from father instead of the deacon. When father answered them back he just said he was sorry she got her feelings hurt & he would try to communicate better in the future. Nothing about thank you for your time served or would you like to continue with the deacon leading the classes. We already knew the deacon was going to be involved. We did not have a problem with that at all. It seems there could be a better way to communicate with the people.
Thank you for clarifying that Carolyn. This situation really saddened me because all involved, who were expected to 'step aside' had great credentials. I'm sure the deacon has great credentials, but were there other areas that needed his expertise more?
was this "lack of communication"
"intentional or accidental"? Is there an a reason that parishioners are kept in the dark
about what's going on in the parish? Is it just a big propaganda
ploy, power play?
Is this lack of "shared information" just a tool? If we don't know what's going on we can't
have a voice or a choice. Communication is NOT a ONE way street.It requires give and take from both parties involved. So why are the parishioners so often left off the guest list of the party? And why are we asked to give and give and give while so much is being taken away and LOST from the
parish.
Trust, truth, respect is it too much to ask for? The people of this
parish will still be here( or will they?) just as they have for years as new leadership is set in place every six years or so.
A former priest once said,(Karen correct me here as needed) A good priest never had to ask for money and the parish went on as usual even after he left.
Moral and spiritual support is all we ask. We have enough "qualifired" parishioners to handle the rest. Trust us!
Chelle,
Father Bill once said that someone from the Diocese wanted to know how he kept his parish from having money problems. He simply said, " It's easy, I never ask for money."
And....I think he also said something to the effect, that he would know at the end of his life if he had been a "successful" priest", if the people he had 'pastored', could continue on without him.
Maybe that's what has been frustrating about this 'new parish' situation. We earned his trust, we carried on after he died, and we were eventually replaced. Did we let him down?
Nah........I couldn't even let the sun set on that one!
No, we did not let Father Bill down. Those of us who were influenced by his walk with us, understand that, well, we just couldn't follow where he would never have lead.
In some way, I think he might be rather proud of us! Amen!
First I like to comment about the group photo. I am a catechist and didn't even know there was a photo being taken until afterwards. Secondly, when I hear about the "lack of communication" or "we need to communicate more or better" it makes me laugh, out loud, really loud. Those words, when coming from the administration, simply means that they have been called out and they think that response will pacify us as if the "communication" will ever get better. It won't. I continue to pray for these individuals that they will someday use God's people that are here and willing to share their gifts and talents as God has meant.
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